My words and my pictures. All I have


Golden ripples

It’s over at last! The bad streak my family’s been going through is over. Everything will be fine from now on. My mother’s surgery was last Wednesday (has it really been a week already?), and all went better than well. She was out of the OR in no time, and a short while later she was on the phone talking to me and my sister to let us know everything was ok. I had to teach a class that morning, but that was actually a good thing, because the kids kept my head occupied and I had no time to worry myself sick.

I spent part of the afternoon and the evening with her at the hospital, and she was in a great mood, talking to everyone and asking the nurses for food :). My dad stayed the night with her at the hospital, and the next morning by the time I woke up they were back home. She’s been in bed resting all week, since she can’t make any efforts, but she’s recovering perfectly. We still don’t have the biopsy results, but from what the doctors have said so far we have no reason to worry (too much).

My sister came to visit on Sunday with my niece, and you wouldn’t believe how cute she is. She spent most of the afternoon in my arms, and I even rocked her to sleep. Being an aunt is definitely great.

I had a bit of bad luck yesterday: I tripped and bent bend my foot at an ugly angle, so now I’ve got a big bruise and some swelling. But it doesn’t hurt and I can walk alright, so I’m choosing to see the glass half full.

My favorite happy moment of the week was finding four new crocus flowers in one of my plants. Last week I almost kicked my cat out when he ate the new buds before they opened, and I thought there wouldn’t be any more flowers this year. But on Sunday I opened the door and there they were, four new snow-white buds. The world’s smiling at me, at last :).

Hope you like these shots. I’ve had them sitting around for a while, and I’m glad I finally had time to work on them. I’m really looking forward to start shooting sunsets again, and I may this weekend or next if all goes well and the weather’s not too freezing cold. I’m so glad winter’s almost over!


Positively beautiful

Frosty greeting, everyone! My cat Robin and I have spent the last few days trying to come up with new means of surviving the cold wave. I resent winter for the way it deceives us, dangling the promise of spring in front of our eyes only to snatch it away and leave us red-nosed. I’ve knitted all sorts of things to keep myself warm (leg warmers and turtle necks being my favorites), and my cat has found a dark, comfy spot inside my parents’ wardrobe (which, you can imagine, doesn’t make my parents very happy).

But being faithful to my commitment of focusing on the positive side of things, I’ll write them down and share them with you.

This week’s class with my kids led me to the beautiful realization that being a teacher is more than just about sharing whatever knowledge you’ve accumulated over the years with your students. It’s about bonding with them, too. As part of my residence one of my college teachers came to oversee my class last Wednesday, and the kids shifted into best behavior from the first minute. Not that they usually misbehave (you see, not all teenagers are monsters), but I didn’t see a cell phone or hear any music for two hours, and everyone was even more cooperative than usual.

One of the girls actually argued with her classmate that she likes the way we work and finds it easier than the work they used to do with the other teacher. The second great thing that happened that morning? The boy that misses more than half the classes and sleeps on his desk when he does come to school, was actually paying attention, reading and working that day. I don’t think I’m going to change the world, I don’t even think I’m going to change his life, but at least something I did managed to interest him enough to break him out of his usual apathetic state, even if it was only to make me look good in front of my own teacher.

When I was a teenager I used to think teenagers were the meanest beings on Earth. It’s amazing how much perspective being on the other side of the classroom can give you. I’m having more and more fun planning classes for them, seeing how creative they are when I give them space.

More flowers from the little paradise around the corner from my house. I’ve been trying to get out and take some more pictures, but I really don’t feel like catching a cold right now, there’s too much I have to do. Can the warm weather please come already?


Wild hope

Hello, dear readers! This time I was forced to go missing for a few days because I had a final on Monday morning. I aced it! I can’t believe that one was the last of the burdensome finals. I also can’t believe that it’s just one more final and that’s it. I have to write two or three more papers, but those come easier to me. I’ll be a college graduate by February, people! (That is, if I don’t kill a couple of teachers on the way. Though I can appreciate the paradox in the fact that teachers, who are supposed to help you, usually end up standing in your way).

It’s been a long six years since I was a wide-eyed freshman, and it’s such a thrill that this part of my life is finally going to be over, and a new one’s going to begin.

These lovely flowers grow around the corner from my home, in unoccupied land. Such lovely, delicate beauty makes me feel hopeful, for the simple reason that it exists.

When I took these pictures there was a pretty scary lady hovering around me, as if she thought I was going to throw myself onto the plants and destroy them. Some people are seriously paranoid.


Blossoming happiness

I thank my lucky stars for all the wonderful people I’ve met since I started this blog. The kind words of support and good wishes you left in my previous post have made me feel so much better. There’s light in the world, we just have to focus on it.

That’s what I’ve been doing these past days, paying attention to nature as it grows and unfolds around me. My crocus plants went from the brown bulbs I planted in the autumn to tiny sprouts to the blossoming plants they’re now. I love opening my front door every day and seeing these flowers in my potted garden. My tulips are growing, too, and I just can’t wait for them to have flowers.

I taught my first official class as a high school teacher on Wednesday, and it was a great experience. I was lucky enough to get to teach science fiction, which is my favorite genre and doesn’t fail to enrapture teenagers. All the kids participated, asked and answered questions, shared their ideas – it was the kind of class I’ve always imagined myself since I decided to pursue this career.

I hope you like these pictures, you’ll be seeing some more of my crocuses in future posts :).


Sunshine after the storm

Hello people! Long time no read! I’ll tell you all that I’m truly glad to be back. This blog feels like a piece of home to me, and it seems like forever has come and left since I last posted anything.

I’m sorry I’ve been silent for so long, but July was a trying month for me. First I was swamped in partials and finals, then the flu took over our house and all three of us were sick at the same time. And then the really bad things started.

It’s hard to find the words to say what happened next, because I’m not sure I’ve fully admitted it to myself. I lost a friend a couple of weeks ago. She went through some very bad things in her life, and I guess the time came when it was just too much for her to bear. I’m not sure what I would have been able to do, but I feel, if only I’d been a little more involved in her life, listened to her problems, maybe things wouldn’t have turned out this way. Now I hope that wherever she is, she’s found what she always longed for.

One week after that, my mom came home from her yearly medical checkup and told me she had to have surgery because they’d found something in her breasts.

I’ve been angry and sad and resentful towards the world for weeks. I felt life was holding a grudge against me, throwing bad thing after bad thing at me, making me pay for all the happy times I had this year. Now I’m trying to embrace my sister’s advice and accept the fact that we’re all on a path we need to walk, and the things that happen to us and to those around us are just milestones in that path, not proof that life hates us. I’m trying to see there’s still beauty in the world, and the world seems to want to help. You wouldn’t believe how early spring is this year. The first flowers are already blossoming, my crocuses are full of buds, and my tulips are full of leaves. My niece is healthy and happy, apparently what my mom has is benign but we’ll find out soon enough, and I’m only a few months away from graduation. There’s plenty to be grateful for. And while I’m thanking, thanks to every one of you that wrote or left a comment to see how I was doing. Now you know why I’ve been missing for so long.

I took these pictures weeks ago, on a stormy day with crazy winds that froze my fingers, and I remember how good it felt to be there. They’ve been sitting in my hard drive while my camera sat on its shelf. Not anymore. I’m out there enjoying life again!